Sometimes i just dun understand wat life really is. I'm confused. I'm lost. Or i'm just paranoid? It's true we cant control many things in life. Future, peoples words, thoughts, or watever. Wat disappoints me in life is that things always dun turn out like wat i expected it to be.

People dissappoints me. Wat's with the coldness? It makes me feel so akward being here. Or am i just too sensitive? I really dunno. I dun feel welcome. I feel alienated. I feel isolated. i just dun feel safe and home. Is it me? Or did i do something wrong? I really duno.

All of a sudden i just wanna be alone...

Aj

“Always remember to slow down in life; live, breathe, and learn; take a look around you whenever you have time and never forget everything and every person that has the least place within your heart.”

AJ

Random post

It's been really long since i last updated. Many things happened since my last post. Many happy and some unhappy. I've been back to KL last July. Celebrated my 21th birthday with friends and family back in KL. It was a wonderful day.Although at the starting there was a lil unhappy here n there but it ended up really well. Thanks a lot for all that have taken the trouble to come over.

I promised to upload pics on facebook. But the problem is, facebook is blocked here in China. Dun ask me why, it is just blocked. lol.I'll upload some of the pictures here in my blog soon.

Love,
Aj

I'm freaking emo emo emo now... Don't ask me why. Coz i dunno the reason myself. I just feel like shutting myself in a room n cry all i want. But i know crying will not solve any problem... So i'm still emo-ing... T.T

Mimi in my life... ^.^

Mimi aka 咪咪 is a cat, male one i guess. ^.^ 1 month old on the 4th of May. Very fat n cute. :P
Mischievous, blur n lazy...
Loves sleeping on slippers. hahaha...

With love, Aj.

Book...

I always have trouble putting my thoughts into words. Thinking back, i wonder how i got A1 for my english during SPM and A2 for GCE o-levels. I guess their standard of marking must be really low back then. lol.

During A-lvl i hate Econs and Business cause i know i cant write. I can remember the facts, but i just cant put them in a way where the examiners like em. I love Quennezy's essays. Coz there are a lot of elaboration and when u read, u feel like u r learning. Unlike mine, when u read u know it's all from lecture notes. hahaha. I guess how u write is much influence by how u think and wat you read. Quennezy read a lot i know. Now she have to read even more, coz she is studying law. hahaha.

Now in uni, i face the same problems again. I seriously cant write. My english vocabulary is seriously to limited. When i write, i feel ashamed of my standard. I have to say i did quite some lifting for my assignments. Hm.... Seriously, to improve in writing skill, one shall read a lot or at least a lil constantly. My chinese is slacking, my english is slacking, malay too, n even cantonese. WTH... where is my freaking part of brain for languages.

When i face problem in essay writing, I always blame myself for not reading. Lemme think. From young till now i seriously, rarely finish reading books. I think i do finish quite some story books when i was young, like high school time. Books like Enid Blyton, R.L. Stine, Malay books and of coz out literature n komponen sastera book. hahaha... during form 5, for K. Sastera i din even read the novel, coz it was too boring. i dun even remember the name of the novel lol i think bukit kepong or something. Now back home in KL. Most of the books on my shelf are comics.

Hahaha... Comics. My fav. Conan (have big portion of the collection), Doremon (my fav, nearly complete collection), Dik Cergas (got from JIN, Fred n dunno who) never return to them, Penyiasat Remaja(several, my fav too) n some from my brother. Lil words but loads of picture. i love it. hahaha. Wait. not forgotten magazines. ^.^

Books i have finish reading after high school. I think there was not more than 5. 4 from rlstine. and one Zoya. A birthday pressie. Cried like anything when i read that book. Seems like most of the people died. lol. Other than that, Sam walton's made in America (not finish till now)

Aih... Once a while i do read newspaper online n blogs, but from wat i see in my english standard in writing. I really suck... aih... Still sit here n blog. I'm suppose to continue doing my assignment. I freaking love to procrastinate lately. Not actually procrastinate. But i really duno how to do my assignments. I spend time doing research, but i cant let my self to write about it. T.T
For this whole year, my life is gonna be like tat. Research, analyze and write. I hope everything will be fine soon.

Load to blog, will update soon when i finish my assignments.

With love,
aj

Good morning.

It's 4.30 in the morning, she is awake again. She knew she have to be responsible to finish her work. There she was, putting in 100 percent of her focus in it. But she knew, it's not the best she could do. She walked out lifeless. Like a soulless figure. She even doubt if she had a shadow...
It's still attached...

Another day has passed... She'll still be her... same old her.

Aj